How to Stop Worrying About Weight

Worrying about weight can feel constant…like a low-grade hum you’ve learned to live with, even though it drains you. For so many of us, this worry didn’t appear out of nowhere. It was shaped by childhood comments, diet culture “rules,” doctors’ visits, social media, and the belief that our worth is tied to how small we can be. But here’s the truth I’ve learned personally and from years of walking alongside clients: weight worry doesn’t have to be the narrator of your life.

It can soften. It can get quieter. And it often starts with a few intentional shifts in how we relate to our bodies.

1. Stop focusing on it and let it be.

This one sounds simple but it takes consistent work.

We’ve been taught that monitoring, micromanaging, and controlling our weight is responsible, healthy, necessary. Many people don’t even realize that the constant checking, evaluating, and scanning is just another form of hypervigilance—a nervous system stuck in protection mode.

But the more we fixate on weight, the more it becomes a measuring stick for every choice we make.

Letting it be doesn’t mean you suddenly love your body or never get triggered. It means you notice the weight worry when it pops up-“Ah, there it is again”-and then you choose not to follow it down the tunnel.

It’s the practice of allowing discomfort instead of trying to eradicate it.
It’s holding multiple emotions at once…fear, hope, frustration, compassion….and staying with yourself anyway.

That’s body respect in action.

2. Live life anyway.

One of the biggest lies weight worry tells us is that “you can’t live fully until your body looks different.”

But healing happens in the exact opposite direction.

You live now.
You eat the meal now.
You go on the trip now.
You let yourself be in photos now.

Your life is not on pause waiting for a future version of your body.

When we shift from “How do I look?” to “What do I want to experience, feel, or learn?”—that’s when things change. Life starts to feel bigger, softer, and more aligned with your values…not with fear.

You don’t have to feel fully confident to live fully. You just have to be willing.

3. Treat your body with respect.

This is the part that changes everything.

Respect isn’t about loving how your body looks.
It’s about treating it like someone you care deeply about—even on the days when you don’t feel connected to it.

Respect looks like:

• Feeding yourself consistently, even when the eating disorder voice pushes back.

• Resting without guilt.

• Moving for joy, not punishment.

• Setting boundaries with people who talk about weight, diets, or bodies.

• Replacing self-blame with self-compassion.

• Choosing curiosity over criticism.

Respect is how you build trust with your body.
Trust is how you build safety.
Safety is what makes worry loosen its grip.

And you don’t wait for the worry to disappear before you do this work.
You do this work, and slowly, the worry stops being in charge.

Weight worry fades…not because it magically evaporates…but because it stops being the place you return to for control, identity, or safety. You learn to live with your body as it is today, not as a project you need to manage or a problem you need to solve.

Your body becomes a companion, not a battlefield.

And if you’re ready to stop letting weight anxiety dictate your choices and start treating your body with the respect and tenderness it deserves, there is a path forward. A path grounded in freedom, nervous system safety, and trust…one that leads to a life bigger than anything weight-worry could ever offer.

✨ Apply to work with Jamie and get to FULL recovery.

The Backlash of Ignoring Hunger: Why It Leads to Overeating

We often think that skipping meals, avoiding certain foods, or “being good” will help us stay in control. But the truth? Ignoring your body’s hunger signals almost always backfires … both biologically and psychologically.

Here’s what’s actually happening when you push hunger away:

1. Primal Hunger Kicks In

When you go too long without eating, your body goes into SOS mode.
You feel urgent, panicky hunger, and you reach for the quickest, most energy-dense foods. This isn’t a lack of willpower - it’s survival mode.

Ignore hunger long enough and you may notice:

• feeling “out of control” around food
  
  

• eating like it’s your last chance
  
  

• more binge–restrict cycles
  
  

• losing trust in your own hunger cues
  
  

Your body wants to help you, but ignoring it teaches your brain the opposite.

2. The Deprivation Effect

Any food you label as “off-limits” becomes louder in your mind.
Restriction increases cravings, obsession, anxiety, and fatigue.

We think we’re controlling food… but food ends up controlling us.

3. The “What the Hell” Effect

Diet rules set you up to fail. One small “slip” leads to the all-or-nothing spiral:
“Well… what the hell, I already messed up.”

It’s not a mindset flaw — it’s a predictable response to restraint and guilt.

4. Anticipation of Restriction

Even thinking about restricting a food makes you want it more.
People told not to eat chocolate actually eat more of it before and after the restriction period. That’s how powerful anticipation is.

5. The Forbidden-Fruit Phenomenon

Trying not to think about a food only makes it harder to stop thinking about it.
It’s human nature — and trying to suppress those thoughts only strengthens them.

The Takeaway

Ignoring hunger, restricting food, and shaming yourself aren’t signs of discipline — they’re setups for overeating and disconnection from your body.

Hunger isn’t the enemy.
Your body isn’t the enemy.
Restriction is.

When you understand the psychology and biology behind overeating, the whole picture changes - and so does your path to recovery.

✨ Apply to work with Jamie and get to FULL recovery.

Terrified of Weight Gain in Recovery? Here’s the Secret to Moving Forward

Is it normal to be scared of gaining weight?

Fear of weight gain is one of the most common struggles in eating disorder recovery. You might think the solution is to wait until you “feel ready” or avoid this fear all together…but the truth is that avoidance only makes anxiety stronger. The real key to moving forward is exposure work: gradually facing the fear instead of running from it.

How to Get Over the Fear of Gaining Weight ~ Reduce Anxiety About Food, Eating, Exercise & Body with Exposure Therapy:

Avoiding weight gain or waiting to be “ready” can keep you stuck in recovery. The fear of gaining weight can feel overwhelming, but avoiding it reinforces the message that your body is unsafe or that you can’t handle uncertainty. Recovery isn’t about control- it’s about learning to trust your body while challenging the thoughts and feelings that hold you back.

What is Exposure Work in Eating Disorder Recovery?

Exposure work in recovery involves taking small, manageable steps to face the fear of weight gain. This could include tolerating increased portions, trying foods you’ve been avoiding, or confronting anxious thoughts about your body. The goal isn’t to rush or force change…it’s to slowly build tolerance to fear, teaching your brain and body that you can survive uncertainty.

Research shows that gradual exposure is one of the most effective ways to reduce anxiety and regain confidence in recovery. By practicing exposure consistently, you can decrease fear, build resilience, and reclaim freedom from obsessive thoughts about food, weight, and shape.

How do you know you’ve recovered from your eating disorder or disordered eating?

It’s important to remember: the number on the scale isn’t the measure of your recovery. Progress is about how you feel in your body, how you relate to food, and how much anxiety has less power over your life. Exposure work teaches that fear doesn’t have to stop you—it can be a guide for growth.

If fear of weight gain is holding you back, there’s support available. My recovery coaching, and guided programs can provide the tools and structure to safely face this fear and continue moving forward. You don’t have to wait to be “ready”- you can start taking steps today.

Stuck in Quasi Recovery? How to Move Toward Full Eating Disorder Recovery

Many people in eating disorder recovery reach a point where they feel “better but not fully recovered.” This phase, often called quasi recovery, can be scary, confusing, and frustrating. Understanding what keeps you stuck and how to move forward is key to achieving full recovery.

What Is Quasi Recovery in Eating Disorder Recovery?

Quasi recovery is the stage where you may have made progress—you’re no longer in the most severe parts of the eating disorder—but you still struggle with food, body image, or restrictive behaviors. You might feel “almost there” but find yourself slipping back into old patterns or obsessing over weight, food, or shape. Recognizing this phase is the first step to breaking free.

Why Does Quasi Recovery Feel So Terrifying?

Even though you’re technically “better,” quasi recovery can feel like walking on a tightrope. You’re caught between wanting full recovery and fearing change, weight gain, or letting go of control. This fear is normal, but avoidance often keeps people trapped in the quasi recovery stage. Understanding that fear is part of recovery—not a sign of failure—helps reduce anxiety and build confidence in your next steps.

What Keeps People Stuck in Quasi Recovery?

Several patterns commonly prevent progress:

• Avoiding foods that feel “risky”

• Obsessing over weight, shape, or calories

• Relying on old coping mechanisms for stress or emotions

• Waiting to “feel ready” before making changes

These behaviors reinforce the eating disorder mindset, making it hard to fully move forward.

How Do You Move From Quasi Recovery to Full Recovery?

The key is exposure work: gradually facing the fears that hold you back instead of avoiding them. This can include:

• Trying foods you’ve been avoiding

• Challenging restrictive rules around meals

• Tolerating anxiety about your body and weight

• Rebuilding trust with your body and mind

Exposure work teaches your brain and body that fear is not dangerous and that you can tolerate uncertainty. Over time, this practice reduces anxiety and allows you to reclaim freedom from obsessive thoughts about food and weight.

Why Full Recovery Is Possible

Even if quasi recovery feels never-ending, full recovery is possible. By understanding the patterns that keep you stuck, practicing exposure to feared foods and situations, and seeking the right support, you can move beyond this stage and finally feel at home in your body. Recovery isn’t just about what you eat—it’s about reclaiming your life, your confidence, and your peace of mind.

If you’re ready to stop feeling “better but not recovered” and take actionable steps toward full recovery, there’s support available. My signature program offers structured guidance, personalized coaching, and practical tools to help you move past quasi recovery and build lasting freedom from your eating disorder.

I Just Binged. What Do I Do?

First, take a breath. A binge can feel overwhelming, confusing, or shame-filled, but it doesn’t have to spiral AND it can be a growth opportunity. Here are the steps I walk my clients through so they can break the cycle and move toward FULL recovery.

1. Still Eat Consistently

It’s tempting to “make up for it” by skipping meals or waiting until you’re starving again… but that actually fuels the next binge.

Your body needs predictable nourishment.

Aim for steady meals and snacks that satisfy your hunger, stabilize blood sugar, and include foods that feel both satisfying and satiating.

2. Stop Restricting Foods- Allow All Foods

Restriction (even the subtle kind) increases cravings and sets the stage for bingeing.
If certain foods are labeled “off-limits,” the desire for them intensifies.

Recovery comes from learning to include all foods without guilt, building trust, and practicing moderation and variety rather than control.

3. Stop the Post-Binge Shame

Most people try steps 1 and 2, but this is the one that keeps them stuck.

Shame after a binge often leads straight back into restriction… and then into another binge.
Self-criticism doesn’t prevent the behavior … it reinforces it.

Practice self-compassion:
“What do I need right now?”
“What was going on for me?”
“What triggered the binge?”

This is where healing begins.

4. Get Curious (Not Judgmental)

A binge is information, not a failure.
Look gently at what led up to it- hunger cues, emotions, stress, loneliness, body image triggers, or restriction patterns.

Curiosity moves you forward. Shame keeps you stuck.

Even If We Ate the Same Foods… We’d Still Look Different. Here’s the Science.

Even if every single one of us ate the same foods, in the same amounts, and moved our bodies the same way… we would STILL look different.

And no....this isn’t an opinion. This is what decades of research show about human variability, genetics, metabolism, hormones, and the natural diversity of bodies.

In this pod I break down:

✨ Why body diversity is biologically normal

✨ The “Poodle Science” metaphor and how it explains our cultural bias

✨ Why thin bodies have become the default “standard,” and why that’s scientifically inaccurate

✨ The REAL factors that influence weight and shape (genetics, hormones, metabolism, microbiome, trauma, meds, stress, and more)

✨ Why “calories in/calories out” is incomplete and often misleading

If you’ve ever wondered why your body doesn’t look like someone else’s… or felt like you were “doing everything right” and still not matching the standard...you’re not broken. You’re not failing.

You’re simply not a poodle. And you were never supposed to be.

Your body is meant to have its own natural range, and when you understand that, everything changes.

If this resonates, you can explore more support, courses, and resources on healing your relationship with food and your body on my website.

I’m Not Hungry…Why Am I Eating? | Understanding Hunger & Intuitive Eating

Ever find yourself eating even when you’re not hungry? Today, we’re breaking down hunger - We’ll cover:

• Different types of hunger: physical, sensory, and emotional

• How honoring hunger supports intuitive eating and prevents overeating

• The consequences of ignoring your body’s signals
  
  Learn how to trust your body, reduce food obsession, and create peace around eating ... because hunger isn’t your enemy, it’s your guide.

End Food Noise For Good: My Three-Pillar Roadmap For Lasting Food Freedom

Disordered eating doesn’t have to control your life. In this video, I share my 3-pillar roadmap to end food noise, rebuild body trust, release food rules, and find true nourishment freedom. 💛

This study says it all...restriction always backfires!

I love using this study with clients because...well, there is just no arguing with it. AND it really shares how restriction is bringing us in the opposite direction of our goals for food freedom, peace from food noise, health, and body confidence

🍽️ The Minnesota Starvation Study: What It Reveals About Restriction and Recovery

Back in the 1940s, researchers set out to understand what happens to the body and mind during prolonged restriction.

What they found? It changed everything we know about food, weight, and recovery.

Here’s a glimpse:

• 36 healthy men cut their calories in half for 6 months

• They became obsessed with food - recipes, cravings, even dreams

• Their energy crashed, moods shifted, and focus disappeared

• When refeeding began, they couldn’t stop eating - and felt “out of control”

Sound familiar?

This study shows that what many call “lack of willpower” is actually biology doing its job.

How to Know if You Are Eating Enough: 5 Signs You Are Under eating

If you’ve ever wondered, “Am I eating enough?” ... this video is for you. I’m breaking down 5 key signs your body may not be getting enough fuel (and what to do about it). From low energy and constant food thoughts to disrupted hunger cues, these signals aren’t failures — they’re your body communicating with you. 

You’ll learn:

 🍽️ How to tell if you’re eating enough without tracking or restricting 

💡 Why your body fixates on food when it’s underfed 

🔥 What steady energy and satisfaction actually feel like 

💤 How consistent nourishment helps regulate hormones, mood, and hunger cues 

Your body isn’t broken... it’s just asking to be fed consistently. Watch to learn how to rebuild trust and finally feel nourished, balanced, and free around food.